peculiar resolution to internal crisis
Saturday night we went to Maryam's party in Matt's studio. Not surprisingly 'hundreds' of people were there from my past. People from UNSW, people from Adelaide. People I'd been madly in love with, people who'd witnessed me acting the fool. Michael of course.
It was like a strange timeline of decisions and impulses.
Talking with Michael was, oddly, a relief. He seems so much the same - he'd smashed the bones in his ankle somehow and was wearing a plaster cast. He didn't hear his mobile phone ringing despite me asking "what's that noise?". After Friday and getting upset about the past, thinking about the whole Alexandria thing, people moving, people being dissatisfied with the way that their lives had played out, it seemed to make sense that he is moving again, and taking his pregnant wife, and his mother to live in Newcastle-on-Tyne. It's just another step in that whole process of change, and movement and being. And it is what he is doing now. That's him.
I felt able to separate myself and what I am doing from these other people. Interested but not involved. Good.
And Matt's studio is so cool - a house with sheds opening onto a courtyard - in Camperdown. Perfect. It gave me hope that we can find a place to live that will have enough room to make things without having to move to the Blue Mountains, or Liverpool, or some other arse end.
It was like a strange timeline of decisions and impulses.
Talking with Michael was, oddly, a relief. He seems so much the same - he'd smashed the bones in his ankle somehow and was wearing a plaster cast. He didn't hear his mobile phone ringing despite me asking "what's that noise?". After Friday and getting upset about the past, thinking about the whole Alexandria thing, people moving, people being dissatisfied with the way that their lives had played out, it seemed to make sense that he is moving again, and taking his pregnant wife, and his mother to live in Newcastle-on-Tyne. It's just another step in that whole process of change, and movement and being. And it is what he is doing now. That's him.
I felt able to separate myself and what I am doing from these other people. Interested but not involved. Good.
And Matt's studio is so cool - a house with sheds opening onto a courtyard - in Camperdown. Perfect. It gave me hope that we can find a place to live that will have enough room to make things without having to move to the Blue Mountains, or Liverpool, or some other arse end.
posted by lynn at 6:24 pm
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